It's in the water...I swear

There are certain things one can do to change one's perspective. Some people move, change jobs, leave their lovers, take acid, study Buddhism, etc...

I quit my job and went to Italy. [listen for the deconstructionist's maniacal laughing]

With perspective good and changed, I have returned to my home with an insane affinity for sparkling water, Italian shoes and gelatto...and have no job. But I'm still laughing maniacally.

P.S. I didn't lose those 10lbs by my birthday afterall. But shhhh! Don't tell anybody.